Happy New Year from Tanzania, Africa

Yes, the Badger has resurfaced after a long hiatus from blogging. I have yet to finish my recounting of days 2 through summit and back down, but all in good time. For now, let me share some of what I’ve been up to since arriving on my third trip to Tanzania on November 30, 2016. 
First, happy new year from Mount Meru Hotel!!

Airborne for Mwanza

As I write this post, I’m sitting on a Precision Air regional jet on a 1.5 hour flight to Mwanza. There I will visit Lake Victoria and the vicinity to see what’s up. More on that later.  The picture above is Mount Meru through a very dirty, cracked window in row 14. Perhaps I’ll climb Meru some day.

“There is one road, and I am the only driver.”

Despite being here for a cumulative duration of nearly two months, one thing is eminently clear:  I will never operate a motorized or non-motorized vehicle here. No matter how hard I try, I cannot get used to them driving on the left (i.e., WRONG!!!) side of the road. Add to that the clusterfuck free-for-all driving habits of the local citizens, and I find myself in a constant state of panic. Even as a pedestrian, I have to be super diligent, because I always look the wrong way for the nearest traffic when I cross a street. Fortunately RG3 (my guide) is always there to direct me safely and smack me if I start to take a wrong step. 

What is most disconcerting is that unlike in the US, pedestrians do not have right-of-way. You walk out in front of a car or bodaboda (motorcycle), they will NOT stop. Period. And good luck with seeking help from the local traffic polisi for help. Last night I saw a motorcyclist get hit by a car right next to me. He fell and was obviously hurt at least a little.  When he looked to the nearby traffic cop for help, the cop wagged her finger and unceremoniously told the motorcyclist to get outta here!  I was horrified, but our taxi driver found it amusing. Apparently the cop had told the motorcyclist to stop, and since he didn’t, he “got what he deserved!”  Ack!  Of course, in the States, the cop would have probably given him a ticket but at least would have provided medical assistance. So, I will continue to be very careful and close my eyes when riding in a bus, taxi, or hiace.

Flying over the Ngorongoro Crater, where I have safari’d twice. 

“Dance ’til you can’t dance ’til you can’t dance no more, git on the floor”

I love to dance. Anywhere. Anytime. Add a few shots of Smirnoff, and you’ve got some damned good cheap entertainment!

On New Year’s I decided I needed to dance all night at a local club, and I did. Our venue was Club D. It was slow going and a small crowd, but eventually we got the party started. Once again, I was the only mzungu (white person), and thus only added to the spectacle of me twerking to African pop, lubricated to perfection by a few shots of vodka. WHOOOOOO!  I think we danced from 11 to 2:30 am, and I loved every minute. RG 3 “allowed” some of the African men to dance with the mzungu (under close supervision ?), and I think I scared every one of them. What I enjoyed most was each of them trying to mimic Honey Badger’s patented moves. At one point I was feeling particularly saucy and jumped up on the elevated dance floor to put on a show for the masses. Why not?!?!  It was SO MUCH FUN. After sweating off about 10 pounds, we finally closed the place down and left. 

Note:  we observed a special room at the club that was the smoking room. But they weren’t smoking tobacco–it was probably bhangi (pot). Too funny!

Note:  we invited Dastan, one of my other mountain guides to go, but he had to be back on Kili the next day, so alas, he missed it. 

I can’t wait to go back and do it again. Alas, I have no pictures from Club D, but perhaps we’ll get some next time. 

“I don’t get it”

Given that toileting habits have graced several of my posts, I feel compelled to share something that I cannot get used to:  local toilets. Most Tanzanian establishments use drop toilets, which is not much more than a hole in the ground. That’s not what bothers me. What bothers me is the lack of toilet paper or any other material to wipe when business is concluded. Okay, yeah you can drip-dry for #1, but WTF!! about #2?!?  I see no obvious way to deal with THAT. So I continue to BYOTP and giggle a little every time. I would rather be doing my business in the wilds of Kilimanjaro than in some of these chooni (bathrooms). Ha–just part of learning and accepting the culture. But seriously, I would like an explanation about what to do when number 2…

UPDATE:  Picture of a typical drop toilet below in a Moshi restaurant. See what I mean?  I’ve now been informed that you turn on that little faucet and wash yourself with it. Okay…

“I wanna new drug”

Another thing that is very different here is prescription drugs. I can walk into any duka la dawa (drugstore) and pick up ANY prescription drug I want–without a prescription!  And I do mean anything. It has been a great convenience. 

There is much more to tell, but I’ll close with that. We just started our descent into Mwanza. Stand by for future episodes, including an episode of “Badger hiking commando” in a later post. You won’t want to miss it. 

Descent over Lake Victoria 

Happy new year to everyone. Badger OUT.